Learn to program in any language in just 15 seconds:
- Go to sourceforge, find the project that already sorta does what you want
- Find a newsgroup, forum, or a neighbour's kid and whine to have it custom tailored to your exact needs, everyone else be damned, free of charge since it is "open source".
NB: Never, ever, ever provide your name, email address or physical address when requested for delivery of code - this is a trick, unless of course, you've won the british national lottery or a foreign politician needs to smuggle money out of their country. That's always on the up and up, I swear...